Cover of Strange Tales #98 (July 1962), pencils by Jack Kirby, inks by Steve Ditko, colors by Stan Goldberg, letters by Artie Simek
The Champion came down to Earth
He was lookin' for some guys to hit
Splash page of "No Human Can Beat Me!" from Strange Tales #98 (July 1962), plot by Stan Lee (?), script by Larry Lieber (?), pencils by Jack Kirby, inks by Paul Reinman, colors by Stan Goldberg, letters by Ray Holloway (?)
He challenged humanity so hard
Our heads from our bodies split
He beat us all at wrasslin'
Tossin' every guy outta the ring
He knocked a baseball outta Yankee Stadium
To Long Island with just one swing
He challenged the greatest weight-lifter
By picking up his stand
He golfed eighteen straight holes in one
And not one ball into sand
He climbed the mightiest mountains
In just one leap and hop
He beat us all at every game
From checkers to Gnip Gnop
But then a guy named Johnny
Made the Champion start losin'
He said 'Don't come back, you son of a bitch
Earth's the best there is at snoozin'.
If you're, like me, a fan of the Ever-Lovin' Blue Eyed Thing, this tales probably reminds you of one of the great comics of the eighties, Marvel Two-in-One Annual #7, in which Cosmic Elder the Champion of the Universe challenges all of Earth mightiest heroes to a boxing match:
Page from Marvel Two-in-One Annual #7 (1982); script by Tom DeFalco; pencils by Ron Wilson; inks by Bob Camp, Mike Esposito, Frank Giacoia, Dan Green, Armando Gil, and/or Chic Stone; colors by George Roussos, letters by Jim Novak
But it's only Mister Grimm who can go the distance in the ring, round after round.
The Thing brings into four-color life that famous saying by Winston Churchill:
"Never, never, never give up."
Alongside with Superman vs. Muhammad Ali, it's one of the greatest comic book boxing stories of all time.
And it ends in a draw.
So, remember, in the words of Mister Charles Daniels: Johnny said, "Devil, just come on back if you ever wanna try again, I done told you once, you son of a bitch, I'm the best that's ever been."